With every new scene, or dialog, or movie I feel that I fall deeper and deeper in love with acting. In theater you can be whoever you want, do whatever you want, put on different roles that would never experience by working in office. It provides opportunities you would never think were possible. I think that by performing other people with their own issues on a stage you learn a lot about yourself. Maybe even start understand yourself better. The only hardship you face is that you can go that deep in acting so you would never get back from the role. It's difficult not to lose yourself in all those different characters because playing each of them you give a piece of yourself and forget which piece actually belongs to you.
This past few weeks we've been working on a dramatic scene of a dad and a daughter. The scene takes place in the prison. The dad killed his own wife and took away his daughter’s mother. Now he faces the death penalty and decides to “take something of his chest” before his death. Turns out that the girl’s mom wasn't as innocent as she thought. The dad tells his daughter that her mother was evil and tried to kill her when she was a baby and that's why he had no choice but to kill his wife himself. The plot is very debatable, in my opinion. On the one side, why would he tell it now? It is very selfish of him. The girl could've at least cherished good memories of her mother but now she has to live as an orphan knowing that both of her parents were criminals. On the other side, it's in human nature to be egoistic. Plus the guy is about to say goodbye to his life and needs to find a way to forgive himself.
I was playing the daughter in the scene. It was exactly the role I always desired to play. The daughter’s pain, fear, anger were so unbearable, so I had to do my best to get into the role. I had to relive everything that she was feeling: her struggle, her emotions, paralytic fear like my own. I had to be her and that's the most incredible part of the whole thing. Trying to be the daughter in such tragedy, I had to lose myself at least for those few minutes. We haven't perform our final draft but I hope I will be able to transform into my character so that nobody would doubt the story. My partner in the scene does well performing the role. I think he could have be more emotional but we still work great as a team.
As far as other teams, I think they are doing just great. The girls’ scene is very dramatic and emotional. It's not a usual form of performance but it looks natural and harmonious. Movements are important in the scene because there are not a lot of them. I like that each girl has her place where she starts and they form a weird form of triangle. It honestly makes me shiver. In boys’ scene a lot has been changed to the better. The scene has a huge amount of tension which is very scary. I think guys worked hard on their scene and achieved a lot. I enjoyed the scene every single time they performed it.
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